EXO Baekhyun‘s latest Kyoongtube update involved reading his favorite passages from You Don’t Have To Be A Good Person To Everyone by Kim Yoo Eun. One of the passages he read was titled, “Increase Self-Esteem,” full of truth describing how we often hold ourselves to stricter standards when we try to be objective, resulting in anxiety and doubt, and in extreme cases, self-loathing.
Instead of treating yourself harshly, you should be kind to yourself, comforting yourself like you would comfort your friend.
Just like how you’d comfort your friend who is feeling down, it is important to tell yourself that it’s okay.
— Kim Yoo Eun
There are three questions you should ask yourself:
Am I underestimating myself? Am I thinking too little of my strengths? Am I exaggerating my flaws?
— Kim Yoo Eun
They’re not questions we often think about, but if you truly want to reflect on yourself objectively, you mustn’t dismiss the possibility that you might be viewing yourself negatively or holding yourself to unfair standards.
For those who struggle to love themselves, the author’s words are truly a comfort and a blessing, and they’re 100% true.
It’s okay to be generous to yourself as much as you are to others. You don’t have to make yourself feel small when you’re already doing well. You are doing well.
— Kim Yoo Eun
While Baekhyun is a light in our lives and full of positivity, he, like the rest of us, is still learning to love himself more. When Baekhyun first read this passage, he realized that he didn’t have as much confidence in himself as he thought; rather, he was someone who wanted to be a confident person.
Baekhyun is one of the K-Pop industry’s renowned vocalists, having a voice many fall in love with and praise. On top of his natural talent, Baekhyun works extremely hard and has been taking vocal lessons for the past few years to further strengthen his voice. But his motivation stemmed not from wanting improvement but because he feared he was not enough.
The reason I first started taking vocal lessons 2 or 3 years ago was because I thought EXO stood for something much more than what I thought I could offer.
— Baekhyun
His fear of disappointing those who believed in him clouded his mind, and he’s still not entirely free from those doubts and worries.
Even after years of vocal lessons and the overwhelming success of his solo albums, Baekhyun couldn’t shake the little voice telling him that he wasn’t good enough.
Already many people had listened to my albums and told me they liked them very much. But the weaknesses felt too big to me.
— Baekhyun
Only after stumbling across this passage did Baekhyun realize that he was too hard on himself and that he might not have been viewing himself objectively at all.
I realized I’m pretty harsh to myself. It says here that ‘it’s okay to be generous to yourself as you are to others. It’s okay not to make yourself feel small.’ It says I should look back and ask myself whether I’m exaggerating my flaws.
— Baekhyun
As an idol, Baekhyun is constantly in the spotlight, and with his talent being commented on and critiqued at all times, it’s hard for Baekhyun to be kind to himself. Thankfully, he’s been able to find comfort in books, and it’s helped him realize his emotions and struggles and guided him to healing and love.
It isn’t easy for anyone in today’s society to love themselves, especially when the world has so much to say about who you are or should be. Baekhyun wanted to share this passage to encourage others who are also learning to love themselves, and if there’s one more truth Baekhyun intends to share with everyone, it’s this one:
I hope you don’t waste your beautiful heart on someone who doesn’t deserve it. Don’t try to do what make others happy. Don’t forget you should do what makes you happy.
— Kim Yoo Eun
You can listen to more comforting messages from You Don’t Have To Be A Good Person To Everyone here: